Dear my thesis,
I am writing to you because I believe we need a reassessment of our relationship. For the most part this relationship is working well, there are advantageous aspects for both of us. However, you are requiring all of my mental energy and are causing great stress in my personal life.
Spending time with you is even interfering with time with my husband and with my family. In fact, today, a beautiful, sunny July morning, I am spending it slaving away for you in front of a computer screen when I should be on a bike ride, hiking, or generally enjoying myself with my husband.
I am unable to read anything out of pleasure because of you. All of my 'spare' time I spend cow-towing to your demands - reading your books, researching new leads, thinking, pondering and considering your ideas. You disrupt my sleeping patterns and my peace of mind.
I look forward to the day when our relationship will end in a completed and bound thesis sitting on the library's shelves, but until that day, could you please try to keep your demands within reason? Remember I'm a human being?
Thank you for your consideration and time,
Your author,
Shelley Williams
It's unhealth, Shell, when you start developing relationships with inanimate objects or unreal people. Do you remember CSI? Yes, that was a bad time for me.
ReplyDeleteI think you should break up with your thesis, Shelley. But don't close the door completely. Then maybe later (like a week before it's due) you can go back to each other in a fit of passion.
ReplyDeleteI can totally relate, Shelley! I had dreams about Brazilian statues for months while I was researching and writing. Theses consume all of your mental energy, but also your physical energy as well - why do art books need to be so ridiculously heavy?
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