confidence

Teaching is fun, exhausting and time consuming. I love it. I can't believe how long it is taking me to prepare a 2 1/2 hour lecture! 5-6 hours for each one! Coordinating images, organizing notes, and I'm trying to be like my professor Heather and how she keeps recurring themes throughout lectures that she tests on later. It's a lot of work, but it's also a lot of fun. It's hard to feel absolutely confident sometimes when I know there are students who are older than me, and probably getting degrees in chemical bio something whatever, but then I remember that they don't have a master's in art history. I couldn't teach anything else but art history.

Made an unexpected trip to the hospital yesterday. Everything is okay, Jo and Millie are fine, but I noticed a huge decrease in movement, and that's one of the things you're supposed to go in for. On a normal day (like today) I feel both babies almost constantly, and it feels like they're doing somersaults in my uterus, but yesterday they were so quiet! I only felt them three or four times throughout the whole day! So we went to Labor and Delivery where they monitored both babies for an hour. They were perfectly fine, and the nurse and doctor said it's possible they are growing too large for a lot of movement, or they were having a growth spurt and were resting more. Either way, Trevor and I were glad we went because it calmed us down significantly. Babies are okay.

I've not been able to see/hear the babies for longer than a few minutes until yesterday, and it was like music to my ears to hear their heartbeats for so long. Trevor and I just sat their in silence listening, it was a lovely married-bonding moment. The monitoring confirmed some ideas I already had about the babies, like their positions and activity. I felt reassured that I could immediately point to where each baby was. It also confirmed what I've been suspecting, that Amelia is larger and more active. She is always nestling up into my right ribcage and punching, kicking, hopping, flipping, playing, whatever it is she does in there. Josephine is much more constant. Her heartbeat was steady and sure, and her movements more measured. She's also a smaller baby by a little bit. Millie's legs are longer, and she seems to like a lot of attention, and if you ask me, drama. She's up front and center in my belly, and likes to make it known. Trev and I watch at night as my belly pops and jiggles with her dancing. We'll see if these are their personality traits when they're born!

Anyway, I have to cover Egyptian, Aegean and Greek art (ALL OF IT) from 4:00 - 6:30 this evening. KILLER class time. Long time. Poor students. I try to make it fun for them! And I have a secret source of confidence today - Trev's put a henna tattoo on my huge belly. I love it. It's the first time I've felt like something on my body is pretty in a looooooong time.