If your esophagus doesn't connect to your stomach, you really have no way of maintaining your saliva and natural secretions. If Eloise's replogle tube is not vigorously bubbling, her esophagus and mouth fill with secretions and she cannot breathe.
This morning a mistake was made, and my baby had to be revived with oxygen. This is dangerous. Not to mention terrifying for a mother. I was not there when it happened, which heightened my vulnerability because I'm already coping with the fact that I can only spend a certain amount of time with her everyday.
Also found out today that she will never be transferred to the hospital 20 minutes away from my home. I'll be using 2 hours a day in I-15 traffic to get to Salt Lake City for months. Oh, and there was a miscommunication about when her second surgery will be. We'll be lucky if we have our baby home by Christmas.
What a crap day.